How to have small talk with a girl reddit. Even just saying hi on the regular is a good start.
How to have small talk with a girl reddit Just remember that it's your responsibility to give too, not just take. Not to mention that all you know about her is that you find her physically attractive. Learn how to interact with multiple women first, so you don't put all your hopes into that one girl. If you can't run, then start walking. It’s crucial you learn to read the situation. I’ve seen some people have success just saying, after a few messages, “I don’t Keep the small talk interesteing while smiling and keeping good eye contact. I'm not saying it's impossible, anything is possible. If you want to be friends I would talk about shared interests and experiences. let her plan the date. 10 minutes three times a week is fine. Or, Social Torture. The small talk works for getting her attention for a moment, then ask something which can lead to a good conversation and possibly a date or her number. I'm used to just talking about stuff only guys talk about, and I know girls don't like This is a personal list I put together for conversation starters that can take place during early dates. It seems that after school/university and starting full time work I've struggled a little to make new friendships, particularly with other women. Dont want to be misogynist in anybody's mind If you have access to a gym, then start lifting weights. I'm curious to see how others maintain and make their female friendships. Start off by being friendly, and talking about the topics that other commenters have mentioned. Like sports, art, or drama? Join a sport or club. It's been working well for me and now I'm more confident in small talk. You just need to spend time with them. Eventually then tell them, "It was nice meeting/talking to you, I gotta head out. You have no clue if you have anything much in common with her beyond that, if she's a nice person or a future serial killer. Hot take - don't. Find work-related reasons to talk to her as opposed to catching her off guard with your romantic interest. The good thing about small talk is that you probably are doing it with someone you won’t see again, and so you don’t have much to lose. Seriously, it's insane how much a girl will be hit up. Closely related. If it dies, it dies. Tl;dr Build your confidence back, love your self, have small talk with people, and be a man who is superior. People my age are having girlfriends . I personally don’t agree with avoiding topics for later, unless it’s something personal or intimate enough to want to talk about face to face, but ymmv. No! You walked up to the girl, and you talked to her. 1. But hear me out. There are likely reddit pages for your city where you could post to meet people. I have been a preferred choice over others in my life, because I only talk as my true self. talk to her as you would talk to someone your age. The OP wants to move beyond this in two questions, which is a reasonable goal, where I don't want to wait that long. ". " As you two get used to talking in greater depth, you can move toward more personal issues, like how the person feels about you or thinks about long So I really want to learn how to small talk. I think, in general, women tend to jump to the conclusion that a guy is hitting on her if he speaks to her for no reason - but there's a difference between that and going out of your way to talk to someone. Say, "Those shoes have a lot of red in them. (1) having a list of questions in mind as conversation openers and continuers: how long have you lived in the area/worked here, what do you do for fun, are you a cat person or a dog person, etc. Try to lead with a question if you can. I'm the typical shy guy, but even when I do have the courage to talk to a girl, I never know what to talk about. Talk to them exactly how you talk to the friends you have now. I’m definitely able to make friends easily and I’m not afraid of small talk anymore. If there is something you can ask her for help with, say a particular problem you had trouble with in algebra or anything at all really, that is an easy start. My issue is, is that i feel it's kinda weird to randomly ask someone questions about themselves unless it comes up in a Don’t spend the evening gawking/staring longingly at them and then approach- trust me, they’ve already noticed, are probably creeped out, and probably already have a strategy to deflect you should you approach. Be genuinely engaged and ask her details and such about things she's talking about that you are People like engaging with people who show a genuine interest and ask engaging topic related questions. If you are caught looking, smile and give a small wave. I haven't had a lot of time alone with her to spark a good conversation, but tomorrow I imagine we will have a lot of time to converse. Then when you start to see she’s nice, you can ask for her number. Then ask her a small related question that doesn’t require she reveal anything about herself. If you walk into the classroom with a gameplan of say this, say that, say this, backup say this, it's fucking annoying and obvious. I myself have an easier time starting conversations when I share stuff about myself. You dont even need to have something in common with them, though it helps. Then, not immediately but somewhat soon after, approach. However, the trick to small talk and otherwise chatting with people you don't know well (especially extroverts) is to be interested in them. Follow reddit rules. If you have any questions, please send the mods a message. I'm 16 years old and I have very little experience with girls. Now you have a small amount of rapport and comfort. As a cashier of 10 years, and working with many others during that time period we don’t want you to make any kind of small talk with us outside of “how are you” you’re holding up our line and making our job harder and just because a cashier is being nice and smiling at you does not mean they want a sexual relationship or to be hit on every time you enter the location our job is to be In my opinion, you should not give a fuck that the person you are talking to is a girl (to a curtain extend, don't badmouth etc. You're a man, and she's no one. small talk is a ramp to connect with people and naturally incline towards deeper conversations. Really LISTEN when she talks about stuff she cares about and ask follow up questions that show you were paying attention. Reply reply Try to get her to talk about herself (ask questions etc). At camp a little while ago I met this girl who lives a few states away. Eventually she'll talk about something you can relate to and that's when you join in and contribute about yourself. This list is by no means You're right that people love talking about themselves, but the main key here is to listen. (No opinion) How do I get past small talk? I love meeting people, but small talk makes it almost impossible to make a real connection with someone. I don't know if she's always taken the same bus as me, but since then I saw her almost everyday and everyday she draws my eyes to her. The thing you need to understand about hitting a random girl up on insta is that so many guys are doing it all the time already. You might feel pressure to have a good conversation, but joking around can relieve that tension. I went from being a very quiet, awkward girl with a nickname “Mute”, to people saying I’m “definitely not quiet/shy”. So what is it for? Small talk allows you to find broad areas of agreement with a stranger, without generating hostility, while mapping out and carefully avoiding It is very easy to know if the girl you are talking is comfortable with you or not. I have a friend who is drop dead gorgeous. Men are guilty of this too. Build off her responses by adding your own personal experience and/or asking another question to keep the ball We have a trip planned where we're going away for one night for skiing. Start off by introducing yourself with a greeting like, “Hi! I’m Joe. "I've noticed that most Here are 14 of the best go-to small talk topics from the Reddit thread. If you’re really serious, then approach by maybe sitting near her and making small talk about the class. If you have chemistry and she shows you signs she is into you, what you talk to her about probably won’t matter anywhere near as much as you. It's best to have a reason to talk to a girl, beyond "just making conversation", it's easier and safer to start a conversation if there is a sense of necessity to it. how you guys as introverts have broken the Ice and started good conversations Generally, introverts hate small talk, but I have accepted that small talk is the only path to the fuller conversation you are trying to go for. All you'll need to do is nod a bit and occasionally ask a follow-up "Really/You don't say/No kidding. Whether you're talking philosophy or the weather - the conversation and relationship benefit from your attentiveness. The only reason that you or any other guy has a problem talking to women, more so than talking to men, is because somehow you have let the idea that because they have a vagina convince you that they are different than you in any significant way (as far as human interaction goes). If you work together, there's plenty of things work related that you can easily use to open up the conversation. After covid , i am too resistant too talk to any girl . Don't think about what to say next, try to understand what they mean. I'm a confident, outgoing woman, and I Fan someone> give them a compliment on their shirt or whatever they have you like> ask their name> tell them yours> talk about the show or the music. I onky want to make some girls as my friend . One tip is that It’s good to have common interests, gives you instant talking points. Its not hard to make friends, honestly. Talk about the things YOU want to talk about, if you’re having a good time chances are she will too. If you think you can talk to a girl and 5 minutes later she'll have a cup of coffee with you, you might be overestimating yourself. After a few weeks of being frustrated with myself for not talking to her, I just manned up after class one day and started a conversation. Look, you can have all the topics and pickup lines in the world, but if you don't roll with it and see them for what they are (dumb ways to break the ice) then none of them are going to work. Say “I’m gonna go tell this girl her earrings are cute” and do it. The conversation should flow naturally. Above that, I think it’s better to first talk with her some more to show her it’s not just small talk and then invite her for coffee or ask for her number. ) Be honest, within reason. After a few minutes, tell her you have to go, but you would like to continue the conversation again. But if you want to go for it. I want to talk to them but i lack the guts . You ask the boring stuff to see if there's anything in there you can jump off of and have an interesting conversation about. We all have preferences and those could hinder us from talking to people that we assume are horrible based on Coming from a girl who has spoken to a few potentials. find something you have Couldn't talk to girls, couldn't look my boss in the eye, rarely got laid. I’m with you on this. So when you would small talk, people smell it is just politeness and fake. So here's how you get the ball rolling. For instance: Person 1: there’s a new girl working here starting tomorrow Person 2: oh cool. Being up on current events is important for the small talk bit (when I was on the road I would watch the local news from wherever I was). A girl doesn't want to talk about how nice her shoes are, she has heard it 1000 times that day. My friend recently asked someone out at a library successfully!!! She was studying and a cute guy near her caught her eye. Small talk is less stressful and personal. People aren't actually that interested in trivial things, and sharing information about the subject the small talk is about isn't the point. Give space, I don't mean "don't approach"', approach, make small interactions but give space when they start to feel uncomfortable and be very understanding if they have a slip of tongue or make an awkward situation (source: me) odds are, shy people wants to interact as much as you, they simply don't know how. A good base is to just talk to her the same way you talk to anyone else. Small talk is a stage people go through before the most important part of flirting is that you have to start small and build up romance over time using the other person's reactions as an indicator to escalate or de-escalate. If a girl is not comfortable then she may give following signals :- 1- Closed body language such as crossing arms 2 - Not making eye contact 3 - Not contributing in the conversation 4 - Honestly? If small-talk is inevitable, they'll happily talk about themselves until they run out of oxygen. It is that simple. What advice/tips do you guys have for having great conversations with girls? Throwaway account, because you know, throwaway. 2. I don't really know if you can use this but I wish you luck with her!! Talk about a funny story or something that made you laugh. I talk about potatoes because it's stupid and absurd. I'm a girl and I've recently found that my friendships with other women have reached a point where they are somewhat scattered. Start small and say what you are going to do out loud to yourself. Talk to her like you are having a conversation with any other friend. Not every chick will be into you and visa versa. We sat on opposite sides of the room. Small talk is like a flint and steel. Luckily, the key to speaking so that people want to listen isn’t complicated. Do not bully or harass other users. Start with simple, basic questions if you don't know her well. I think the trick is to actually be good enough at small talk that both people will enjoy it. And it lets them know you probably aren't trying to Small talk isn't about the subject matter. She slid him a note on an extra sheet of paper saying “Hi, my name is X :)” and he wrote back with “do u think I’m cute or do you give notes to all the library boys” and then they kept passing notes until eventually they got each other’s numbers and scheduled a First, realize that there's no difference between talking to a girl and talking to a guy. just let her know the deal. Don't talk for too long. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or We should make a club. Start with something small. If you don't have the confidence to come up to me in person and make small talk, I assume you'd be a nervous wreck if I decided to go on a date with you, and that's just not attractive to me, at all. These days, I can relatively comfortably stop a total stranger that's a cute girl and at least have a pleasant interaction with her, if not get her number and take her out on a date. But if you don't mentally prepare yourself that you have a high likelihood of If she responds well, then just small talk her. Or use a dating app and say youre looking for friends. Learn how to initiate a conversation. I personally wouldn’t ask a coworker out unless they were in a different department and we didn’t really work together. If all goes well, maybe after a little while you can say something a little flirty, touch her gently in a neutral place like her arm or hand, or mention going on a different type of date next time. This is good advice. Sometimes, even though you try, the conversation just doesn't flow because we don't have anything to talk about. Also you’re probably getting stuck cause you feel like you’re responsible for her entertainment when you should be entertaining yourself. My mind just goes blank. She probably doesn't have any issue talking to normal people, and you don't sound like you have trouble talking normally to other people, so just start of normal like you would making friends with anyone. Preferably something you will Very awkward. obviously). Talking to someone at a grocery store downtown is different than talking to someone at a little grocery mart out in the middle of nowhere. Win one - quality time. Use little quips and anecdotes. Tomorrow the organization where we work is hosting an event for the public, so we have to show up early to help set up the event. (lol) Nope! None of those reasons. Just relax. You're one person talking to another person, and if she's going out with you, she's at least attracted enough to you to see what you're about. If she ends up rejecting you, then you'll feel like shit for a long time, but if she rejects you and you have tons of other options then you won't really feel as bad or even bad at all. Let her talk if she seems happy to talk about a certain topic, don‘t switch topics abruptly, go with the flow. These give her a chance to make small talk and feel comfortable before you Talking to a girl you like is often nerve-wrecking but you can become more confident in yourself by practicing talking to other girls first. Don't force or plan anything. Everyone gets lonely, Everyone wants to have a fun talk, Everyone wants validation. You don’t have to open up about yourself as much and you don’t have to reveal as much about your attitude towards things. I also got to the gym almost every day, and I also have found a lot of guys when they try to talk the girl will interrupt her mid set or exercise which some girls may be fine with, but a lot seem to be way more on edge or freaked out when you catch them while exercising instead of when she is taking a break, cleaning equipment, Yet a bore is someone who talks about himself rather than talking about you. Eventually you’ll connect well and you’ll get a bite. If the coworker is single, your company doesn’t have any policies against it and she’s at the same level professionally (not your boss) then strike up a conversation with her when you two are alone and then ask her out to a specific event. You don’t want text 24/7 though, then you’ll be bored and One validation technique depends on your job, but the small things count, offer to do them little jobs, maybe help them with something, make small talk, keep it professional but get a read for the person. I find it helpful. Plus, chances are, the people you'll meet there (girls too) are nice 'n friendly, and thus less intimidating to talk with. I actually hate small talk openers. This doesn't mean it's gonna get you anywhere with them but as long as you're If we have something in common that we can discuss back and forth, sharing ideas and opinions, then I'm hooked. I guess I could say I have a little crush on her. She is very beautiful and I definetely have taken an interest in her. This is naturally hard for me because I'm a shy-ish person, but I want to fix this. People go there to talk to people, so they have more intention to talk to you People there are strangers so low stake for you. Go help out a charity, dog shelter, etc. I'm a girl, let me tell you what I like and don't like about boys trying to make small talk. Don’t talk about her or yourself. If you approach her and make nervous small talk without getting to the point she'll think your creepy, if she rejects you and you stick around she'll think you're creepy, If you're straight forward and honest she won't think your creepy and will probably be flattered, but if you do get rejected politely disengage and go approach someone else. Plenty of opportunity for small talk, at the least. He would also talk about the future, which is a great way to test the waters about how she feels. The number 1 tip you’ll find in most books is to actively listen more than you talk. If you want to start talking with girls. EVEN SPORTS AND VIDEO GAMES. Start talking to anyone and not just girls. I just start with a "hey", some reeeally simple stuff. I feel like that a lot when interacting with people I have a casual connection with. All in all it makes sense - don't try to act like another person, act like yourself. Get used to talking to people about everything and anything. 15) Practice makes The point is not too find any old group and attend, but rather a group with the same interests as you because you automatically have something in common you can talk about. Make all of the statements you think of into questions if possible. Tell a funny story about something that happened to you. Then you go out and basically talk more about the same shit you've been talking about. Even if you have a class together, you can talk about an assignment or something that she said You balance nerves with Action. I like to go with the flow but I'm also worried I'm making what we have to be more than what it actually is. "How's your day going?" She will likely answer, but if she doesn't ask you back, take the L. But over the course of about 3 or 4 years I changed all of that. Guys who are just trying to F*** have completely different body language than guys who are genuinely interested in a girl. i tend to spend a lot of time alone, and think alot. The more times you force yourself to talk or get into experiences outside off your comfort zone, the less nerves you’ll have. Don't ask things like "how's it going" until you've established rapport. Have/Had the same problem. If you have romantic interest ask them to do something you both have never tried. That’s awesome. if i can't connect with you on something more acceptable/apparent/shallow then why would i trust you with deeper subjects? you wouldn't talk to the person next to you on the bus about your childhood trauma because you don't know that person -- you get to know people by In other words drop one or two small talk comments then leave it be. Also, the positive response you get from others will make you Have you tried talking to her like you do with anyone else? Just because she's a girl doesn't mean talking is suddenly differentI'm curious as to where you got this idea Talk about food, movies, books, hobbies, literally anything. If she does return the favor, she's willing to have a conversation. Don't just interrogate her, answer her Posted by u/Gurillenn - 14 votes and 10 comments. For example, on the sibling thing. Is red your favorite color?" Notice you didn't compliment her but you showed interest. Like reading? Hit up the library. If you can talk with a guy/stranger with confidence and elegance, talking to a girl should be no problem at all. Like if it's an element base power make some small talk on that. You don't need to come out of the gate with impressive, interesting questions. offer complete thoughts and ruminations, treat her like she has a whole brain inside her skull. eye contact and body language play a big part of this, and a lot of patience. Those are two successes! Now you have a goal for the next time: to make the conversation a little bit longer. I agree with this. Don't be afraid of rejection, because you're OP, you're someone and you are a man. Now just talk to her. Girl of five brothers here, my girl group of friends from high school/college all went their own ways. ) Mention something cool you saw during the day or something that sparks a fun conversation. Now that things have settled down, the fact that I have no friends (and no real ability to make friends) and have no girlfriend (or have ever had one, or had sex, or kissed a girl, or held hands, or fucking talked to a girl about anything serious and not related to Before you speak to a woman. my thoughts are genuinely onto bigger, broader subjects and it’s exciting meeting someone who shares that hunger for deeper conversations. And then ask a follow up question. Literally anything. The secret is to set Of all my interactions with people, it's making small talk with my co-workers that I find the most taxing. I'm 16 years old (relevant I at a practical level, let her take the lead. Talk to girls like people, any and all girls not just ones who look attractive. I don' have a set thing to talk about. Now I see a girl as a price that can be collected if you are willing to sacrifice, put some effort and eventually turn her into a girlfriend. they described it as less of a chore, more of a means to gauge someone’s toxicity level before you divulge Around here 90-95% of women write nothing or something so bland you would initiate small talk. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now Basically if your a girl and you don’t talk, your a lot more likely to be outcasted compared to a guy who is quiet. Text her with meaning, but keep it brief and light. You get to make two small talk comments and if you don't have a reply of three or more words after your two tries, you're done. Introduce yourself make some small talk and feel the vibe of the convo if she’s not feeling it move on down to the next girl. Try another topic the next time you have a small-talk exchange. Be real. View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. Talk about what is happening around you guys. I really like this girl and although I haven't told her (and she probably doesn't know) but I dropped all the other girls and stopped using OLD after our second date. He has the character of a brick and not much of a sense of humour. And in that small talk, if you're perceptive, you'll see the opportunity to ask questions that get to a deeper understanding of the person. ) Be relaxed and have fun. It really helped her and I thought a lot of you guys can definitely use it as well. Small talk isn't trivial. Like if she noticed something or if she knows information you don’t but would like to. I'm a very polite person, but I honestly don't want to have to say "hi" to you every single day or ask you how your day is going, and I don't need you asking me those questions either. I’ll say one other thing. Make yourself interesting to talk to, and learn to speak to a variety of subjects, hobbies, current events. They are not. Ask her questions about anything and everything. It sounds simple but for some people active listening is hard. I do think that the conversation either flows or not, this applies to even texting. Speak from specific personal experiences when giving advice. Next, A conversation is Q&A. You have to hear and digest every bit she says and actually be interested in what she says. Eventually you’ll have the confidence to walk up to a girl and say she’s beautiful. Also, you can leave whenever you want. When I talk to this girl I like thought I cant get anything out except the basic hi>hello>whats up>thats interesting> oh nice> AWK SILENCE. The only thing that changes is the topics. It helps if it’s something about them like an article of clothing that catches your eye, something they’re doing, To talk to a shy girl, approach her by yourself instead of in a group to avoid overwhelming her. I used to be anti small talk, now I do it okay, and a little bit. You don't have to run fast, just run and then slowly build it up over time. So, this makes your job extremely hard because you have to do several Small talk strikes them as boring and/or pointless because it is almost always not interesting. Avoid small talk. What should you talk about? Start with normal topics, small talk, the rest of the conversation will unfold by itself if you actively listen and respond. Feel free to use them, feel free to not! Maybe it can help others who also want to use girl-y language like you :D Syntax: Women use more inclusive pronouns, adverbial clauses, conjunctions between sentences and tag questions. Shour_always_aloof • Male • it's not pointless. Even just saying hi on the regular is a good start. People love talking about themselves. if she's uncomfortable, she can set the pace to something she's more comfortable with. that said, i saw a video that changed the way i think of small talk. Ask if she is free for coffee 2 days ahead. Open-ended questions that require more When you’re better at small talk, social events will not be excruciating, and talking to people becomes enjoyable. Ask open ended questions about interests that she has on her profile. If you're attracted to her, you'll want to talk to her. she's meeting you as you are, and your experience of yourself is full of all the weird history you know about yourself, but she doesn't have any clue about any of that. Just start small. You don't have to tell every single life secret, but you gain absolutely nothing by lying or pretending to be someone you it’s boring. You have to ask them about a bunch of shit that doesn't matter in order to convince them you're cool enough to meet. All this stuff about asking more questions as a way to inspire non-small-talk is correct. Hi people, I recently helped a coaching client by making her a small talk cheat sheet. If she doesn’t seem engaged or want to talk, excuse yourself politely. Ask Open-Ended Questions. Every girl is I think the first step you to need to make is be able to make small talk with everybody, guys as well and not just girls. It's the exchange of credentials. Those girls seems to 1) give you little to play with, 2) shows little subtle signs of interests, 3) resists very easily any escalation attempts (not just to sex, but to meeting up, be in isolation with you - this is less likely to happen with an introverted girl who is into you!), 4) outright rejects you, 5) shows minor or major signs of No small talk (hey, how are you, etc. This is the thing I have come the longest way in. If I am talking to anyone new, I don't like to drone on and cling to them. If you don’t communicate about how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking it just complicates relationships (romantic and platonic) much more than if you were to be straight forward and honest about things. I sensed that now I can come up with things to say even if I don't have a deep understanding of the topic. Everyone in their lives probably makes small talk to them and it is none of those things. Let the moment come. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. true. My girl is actually trying to rebuild her social life I am 18 Male . Just ask her how her day is going and let it flow from there. The best conversations build off of previous things until they tangent out of your control. At the end of the day, people generally just want to feel useful. Your neighbor, postman or friends down the street and practice your social skills. Don't be nervous and maintain eye contact. If you don't have access to a gym (or you don't like lifting), start running. Find Posted by u/trex364 - 18 votes and 52 comments Recently I noticed this girl that's already on the bus when I get in. When you talk to someone, the first thing you have to do is listen to them. There’s no trick, they are people. There are 2 masks at work, the professional mask, and the personal mask. If you want to chat with a woman who shares nothing but Most people want to be valued for more than just that. This is the easiest cure to that. You don’t want to waste your whole energy texting a girl and have nothing to talk about in real life, the main goal with texting is to set the bar high and setting up the 3, if you have time (yes, you do). Much better. Tell her a joke, be a Hey guys, I usually don't have any trouble talking in a small group or talking to someone at a party if its just a random person, even a girl, I know. If she gives a one word "yeah" answer, she's not interested in talking. Example. "Yeah, I have a lot of siblings and they are pretty awesome at keeping life interesting. Made a couple friends because they were dating guy friends of my boyfriend, I only have true friend dates every other month, but no group outings. Girls are no different than guys when making talk, they're not of a different species. Example "what do you But, if you have anything in common with this (or any) girl (or person), the conversation will flow, trust and believe. if you see someone you like, simply interact with them normally. I also have a number of games I play and if one of them gets stressful to the point that it's affecting my enjoyment I take a break and play something else instead. Sure he can pull easy chicks if they've been drinking (who can't) but if there has to be any talking at all involved they lose interest fast. I'll talk about how I fucking love them so much that I'm going to start a society for potato lovers. No victim-blaming This is a default message - your post has not been removed. I dont have any problem with that . " a little harsh but it helps out when you're starting a conversation with a girl. Turning small talk into meaningful conversations is literally my job. There is no formula aside from being a good listener. Small talk is the ultimate way to create a good first impression. Get to know her. When you learn how to talk to people, you will also learn 'girls' are people too, and not some 'Alien' thing. Ask to talk on the phone or FaceTime DO NOT COMMENT ON ANYTHING PHYSICAL. For example : "While walking to college today, I passed a pet shop, reminded me of my dog I had when I was a kid. The best small talk is about something that's happening or observable at the time, because you both have access to the same information. The focus of this is to bring a more outside-of-the-box discussion to help you succeed with your dates so they feel more like a date and less like a job interview. Nobody likes small talk. No need to apologize~! You're all good! If we're talking about *language* vs voice, then I have a few recommendations. Also, you can get away with having the same formula of small talk questions. For younger generations (under 22-23) it’s totally okay to ask a girl for her insta or something. Encourage the person to respond to topics in the future by ending the exchange with something like, "I really like talking to you. Ask her questions about herself. I'm going to a birthday this weekend where I only know the birthday person, so I could really use some help. I grew up in a conservative family/school system where talking with girls is seen as a crime. I’ve lost soo many relationships because of this when I first meet the girl I’m confident and it’s easy for me to talk to the girl but after we establish our feelings towards each other and start talking I get nervous and don’t know wtf to say 31 votes, 208 comments. Spent over 20 years without having a good friend as a girl. The direct Q/A is annoying & uncomfortable. (2) Stupid small talk isn’t about the small talk. Things that I find have helped are positive self-talk and building connections with friends who are genuinely supportive and help me feel good about myself :). This is just as awkward for us, so just relax and have regular conservations and bring up questions related to it and of course, you can have the important conversations after you guys get a little comfortable. What is important is what your nonverbals are saying, and not just your words. But you have just opened with something more original, a conversation about favorites and colors. Yes we like that too. Don’t give one word or short answers. (HIDDEN SECRET!) The the true purpose is not to "fill the air with words" or keep blabbing because someone is standing right there, or talk for the sake of talking because it's expected. I have started treating small talk as a game of 'what do we have in common' and that really does help keep the conversation going once you find out what that is That's a Classic Small Talk Situation, so the thing to keep in mind is the TRUE purpose of small talk. So yes definitely talk to a girl about what you’re thinking and feeling so you can be on the same page Are you getting help for your anxiety? Either rx help or talk therapy. They are just as flawed and just as awesome as you. Talking about yourself and stuff you care about has been shown to cause a dopamine hit, in other words people get a little bit of a high from talking about themselves and opening up to someone who is receptive. As a girl who is sensing that a male colleague may be somewhat romantically interested because he started going out of his way to ask me work questions when he could have asked others, I think you could start off doing that. Once there's a break, excuse yourself with "Pardon guys, let me just go check up on the kitchen/your food real quick". First, start talking with every 'Human' you encounter. If she's attracted to you, she will want to talk to you. Say hello, introduce yourself, ask her how she’s doing, make a joke or comment on something harmless. Also body language is a big indicator. The opener could be small talk, a question, a statement, or maybe just Hi and a smile. Definitely ask questions. Continuers: tell me more about that, asking open ended follow-up questions. Offer an exact day, time and place. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. "Make an observation. Muscular, tanned, chiseled jawline, permanent 5 o clock shadow, great hair, dreamy blue eyes. Maybe a little bit I'm still attracted to her, but she lives pretty far away now and is attending a rather prestigious university, meanwhile I'm a poor, jobless dude. Here are 15 no BS Check out the list below to get started. The point is that it doesn’t all come down to small talk. HOW TO DEAL WITH SMALL TALK 1O1 If you're a girl you can't have a normal conversation without a dude whipping his dick out. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Ask questions that show you’re interested. The reason you only talk about college and have no idea what to talk about, is usually because you are filtering your thoughts too much. For me, talking to people (especially small talk) Most of the answers work perfectly fine. "If you could have one super power what would it be? And why?" From this one question you could tell the person personality. There will be girls that you just won't click with and I think that's fine but there are plenty of them out there, some are even on reddit who are willing to talk to anyone. You just have to do it man. Hope it helps you man, and you can do it:] When you have the short conversation with the girl in the shop and after 30 seconds it dies down and you don't know what to say anymore, don't categorize this as "failure" in your head. Trying to keep the conversation on-topic and matter-of-factly can help to prevent misunderstandings. Talk about a mutual subject if you have that in common. When you meet her irl on a date makes it so much easier to talk. Then, when you find the girl you like Here are 27 expert techniques for nonstop, effortless chatter guaranteed to keep her interested. seriously, this is all it is. That gives the other person some time to come up with something to say, or doesn't piss them off if they don't really feel like talking. I’ve been in sales for 21 years as both a rep and a manager. The more you get comfortable with giving compliments the better you will become at talking. You’re These upfront tips will help you to improve your small talk when speaking to women so that you can feel more confident. He would want to be near me but in a non pushy sexual way, if you get what I mean. It's a conversation. That's why I do profile reviews. The strat is to talk to as many girls as possible starting from the hottest chick in the party then move downwards. If it's something technological make a joke on how she's gonna rule the world. You have to push intrusive thoughts aside and listen to their story. That will produce many memories and inside jokes. I really want to be able to chat at the gym or at gatherings, but when people come up to talk, I have no idea how to continue the conversation. I've had the same experience with a girl in class a few years ago. Just make some casual talk, could just be your basic weather, or "How's it going?" or weekend plans and keep it smooth. The main problem is people do small talk about really boring stuff, and with no emotion and it becomes very rote. But there is a win-win-win on the table of every conversation, and it's small talk. The thing is: you hate small talk. If she follows up with any statement of 3 or more words, it means it's ok to talk. Keep it simple. tbdz wgirhfr sitpy sbcpy vdsr mfeymw xny gygboi nblun havdb